Lately, I’ve gotten myself in the habit of doing a Pilates workout routine almost every day. But before I found Pilates, I had a hard time staying consistent with any workout routine. Why? Because I’d judge myself.  

The weights I’m lifting should be heavier. I should be doing more reps. 

Those thoughts would go through my head. The all-or-nothing mindset I had was keeping me from making any progress at all. Because of the pressure I was putting on myself, the weight workouts I was doing made me feel tired and agitated. In the end, I stopped doing them altogether. 

I realized I needed a workout routine that was more realistic for me and would work with my body in its current place. That’s when I found Pilates and an (online) instructor who created an environment for me to feel safe within my body as I moved. She made me feel like it was okay to only stretch one day if I was worn out. I had permission to do the version of a movement that was right for me. After that, not only did I not mind working out, I started to love it.

Every little bit counts. 

Don’t get discouraged. 

Have fun with it.

Fast forward to about a month or so ago. I tried an advanced workout for the first time. The warmup — and yes, this was just the warmup — was to stand at the end of your mat, bend over and reach your hands down to touch the mat with straight legs, and walk your hands out until you were in a plank position. Do three Pilates pushups. Walk your hands back and roll back up to a standing position. Repeat.

I felt overwhelmed when I first saw the routine. I can’t do that. I’m not flexible enough. But something within me wanted to try it. The first time, in order for my hands to touch the mat when I bent over, I had to bend my knees. When I reached the plank position, I collapsed on the first pushup. I had to bend my knees to walk my hands back and stand again. 

I tried again another day. I still had to bend my knees, but I figured out the Pilates pushup form and managed to do a few on my knees. 

I tried again a day after that. Same thing. 

Days later, I tried it again. For the first two rounds, I had to bend my knees. But in the last round, I was able to walk myself up and back while keeping my legs straight.

I was so happy! I had done it! I may have had to use the tips of my fingers to push myself back up, but I did it.

The next time, it was only the first round I had to bend my knees. The try after that, I could do the whole thing while keeping my legs straight.

Fast forward to a few days ago. I did the routine again and I could do the whole thing, Pilates pushups and all, and I actually had fun.

It’s a small victory that left me feeling good, and it’s one that got me thinking. I was reflecting back on my progress and it really hit me about what a great example it was for the process of building skills. 

All my life, I’ve struggled with an all-or-nothing mindset. I’d get embarrassed if I couldn’t do something I thought I should be able to do fast enough. I’d quit before I even gave it a proper shot. I wouldn’t take the time to build the fundamental skills necessary to achieve what I wanted to do. Instead, I’d rush to the finished product, and in the end, fall short. 

Was the routine frustrating the first time around? A little. But I faced the fact that I couldn’t do it at first and kept trying until I could. 

It reminded me that:

Every effort counts.

It’s okay to start small.

When you try something challenging that will push you to grow, it won’t be easy or possible the first time. Keep trying.

Small, consistent steps forward lead to growth. It made me feel confident in that I don’t have to get it all right and perfect on the first try. In my hobbies, in my life, in any professional skills I want to build — it’s okay to start at the bottom and work my way up. To dedicate the time to master the fundamental skills, even if my first attempts don’t look pretty. And it’s not just okay, it’s also fun. 

It’s not all or nothing.

While doing the Pilates warmup, I still have to use the tips of my fingers when I reach down and when I push myself back up. But that feels okay now. It makes me excited for the day when I’m flexible enough to place my hands flat on the mat. It may take weeks or months — I have no idea how long, but until then, I’ll just keep moving forward a little more every day, and have fun doing it!